Ramsay’s roll of honour

Steve Kendall | Bendigo Weekly | 05-Jan-2012

«
Cartoon by Jayden Edwards
»

This year Steve took some culinary advice from the TV royalty of cooking. Out with Nigella and Jamie and welcome to centre stage Gordon

PHEW, that’s all over for another year.
I did take the easy route over Christmas though, internet Christmas cards, phone calls to family.
No sticking on stamps for me.
I did baulk at text greetings though. Don’t think it says enough.
As in “Hi, I am sending this to my whole contact list so I can get it over in 10 seconds flat”.
My policy over the years has reduced my incoming cards, of course.
But I did receive one hand-made card that was magnificent, thanks Annika.
That’s really what it should be about. Make it, or don’t bother.
My home-made efforts would be appalling as I am the type who is covered in glue as soon as the lid is off.
Glitter and glue all over.
In the big lead-up to Christmas I watched some of the celebrity chefs for some ideas.
Nigella Lawson came up with one years ago that has served me well over the years. Even Jamie has thrown in a goodie once in a while.
Nigella’s snow-flecked brownies make my mouth water at the thought of them. Anyway, Nigella’s brownies aside, Gordon *%$#@ Ramsay came up trumps this year.
It seems he has modified his behaviour by bringing in his daughter to help.
No way is he going to drop the F-bomb in front of her.
He explained it all really well, and showed me the eye fillet wellington.
Goodness me, what a beauty, must try that, I thought.
The long-suffering Mrs Kendall was in approval, and to be honest she would be doing the hard work... so we were on.
I went off to buy all the tasty morsels which would make up the dish for Christmas Day.
I dodged the supermarket and headed for the butcher.
A magnificent queue faced me, but I stood my ground. I worked out the weight and cut, handed over the debit card and took my purchase, then off to the deli for the parma ham, the nuts and mushrooms and puff pastry.
It was going to be a doozy.
I piled the goodies onto the counter at home, very proud of my buys. It was all there.
Come the big cook up, and Mrs K seared the meat as Gordon had said, rolled out the cling film, layered the parma ham, wrapped the meat, twisted the cling film to form a sausage shape and into the fridge for a rest. The meat that is, not Mrs K.
Then lay out the pastry, cover with the blitzed and dried nuts and mushrooms, and wrap up the meat, using the cling film trick again for even wrapping.
In the oven after a rest, the wellington not Mrs K... and wait.
Yum.
Out came the beast after the prescribed time... the wellington, not...
The dish looked perfect, just the right colour, texture and all the things which make the meal right.
Okay, I bet you thought I left the cling film in the mixture.
No, it was an absolute perfect dish.
After we’d eaten and relaxed Mrs K investigated the costings I had not even looked at.
With the eye fillet and parma ham, and the mushrooms and nuts, not forgetting the pastry I had spent a fair total.
“The $80 sausage roll,” Mrs K said, with an accusing glance in my direction,  but believe me, Gordon *%$#@ Ramsay had been right about the taste, worth every cent.

More Exposure

Comment





Captcha Image